Puss in Boots

Show me a man who doesn’t like being around beautiful women and I will show you a man who desperately needs to come out of the closet. We love beautiful women. Have you ever sat in a bar with five hot girls milling around you totally hypnotized by your silly stories? Have you ever met the type that just picks up the phone and calls you up – just to hang out even though you’re not gay? Oh, they even remember your birthday even though you hardly remember to show up for dates.

Imagine the ambience, the alluring morph of sweet smelling perfume when you’re seated in a nice lounge with this knee-buckling group of outrageously fly hotties. At one point I had these cute girl-friends who’d always walk me to my car after a lovely evening drink at the bar. Six of them. None of which I had a thing with (I’m dead serious!) Can you imagine that? Rather surprising but cool. Beautiful women can help keep the doctor away. Of course this statement has a disclaimer tagged onto it. Good looking women can heal your heart as well as kill it. They can excite you and also run your pockets dry. So every outcome depends highly on why they hang around you in the first place.

As fantastic as my story sounds, you have to know what lies beneath these beautiful faces. Let me break it down for you young tiger. I will tell you what you didn’t know about your cohort of fly women. Oh believe me, they’re not just there for your pleasure.

Meet my friend Lala, a dizzyingly hot girl who seems to have everything going for her. She is wealthy and successful and she’s only 24! She is deputy vice president or a rotary club and she is paid well for it. But wait, she never used to be like this two years ago! From what I remember, she’d failed miserably in her high-school examinations and she had this unfortunate-but-true reputation of being a blond. She never used to be interested in anything else other than her looks and HER looks. She also had this tendency of telling her friends that she wanted it all! The power, the fame, recognition and all those punchy words ‘liberated’ women use for self motivation (no pun). So the other day, she called me up for lunch and I was happy to join her. I’ve known her all my life and to some extent, I value her as my small sister. I didn’t wait to ask her how she’d ‘blown up’ in just two years! These were her words…

“I know I’m not smart and I may never get any real man to be interested in me. I’ve known that all my life. So today I’ll tell you why I own my house and drive a 6 liter car all in my name. Remember my aunt Terry? The one with a set of cute twins and the adorable husband? Well, that ‘adorable husband’ called me up one day just after finishing school and told me he had an internship for me in his business. I was to work as his personal assistant just to have experience for the time spent before joining campus. A few months into the job, he started acting funny. He would tell his staff that we were going for a meeting and we would end up on a date at a fine restaurant. One thing led to another and eventually we started having sex. I felt guilty all the while and on several occasions I considered telling my aunt what we had been doing. He cautioned me against it and well… he started paying me and buying me gifts in exchange for my silence. And in no time, I started having my own things! I moved out of home and rented an apartment in a nice neighborhood. I won’t lie, I loved every moment of it! I felt powerful, strong and totally in control of my life. At some point, I stopped feeling guilty and even feeling sorry for my aunt. I figured that all men were the same and it was a fact of life. So eventually my aunt found out and together with my ‘employer’ they decided to let me go and cut off my ‘supply’.

I was distraught but I had learnt one big lesson in life. A girl’s got to get what she wants! She just has to realize it’s all in front of her.

Then started my journey. I got a high paying job as a personal assistant to the CEO of a multinational corporation without any qualifications. I am a beautiful woman; I knew he wouldn’t resist calling me that evening after meeting at the Jockey Pub. I got the job in a week flat. My work? Well, people of his calibre run very busy lives. They need someone other than their wives to run their professional and financial lives. Someone who knows how to keep secrets and never gets attached emotionally. I was in charge of what he wore and what he ate. I was responsible for stating how much money he would send his wife despite her protests that I was up to no good. I changed his company’s open door policy to ‘closed door policy’ if you know what I mean. Everyday at unpredictable intervals, I would lock us in his office and ‘work on him’. I would make him do the things I was sure his wife would never do. One day he would open the door at lunch and find me spread on his large mahogany table in sexy lingerie and panty hose already served up to his taste. On other days he’d find a ‘nurse’ that had come to his rescue after hearing he was suffering from a ‘cold’. I nearly drove him crazy but I didn’t care. He eventually left his wife and started being clingy. I hate attachments so I knew it was time to move on. I needed to elevate my status and power so it was on to the next one. I love sex and I love dominating strong men. I am addicted to the havoc my lifestyle causes.

My current boyfriend is a diplomat. He’s a good guy but not really my type. He’s taken me on trips around the world but I’m still not impressed. I need more! He’s leaving his wife, I hear. Too bad. I wish she knew that he likes being tied up to the bed and tortured with candle wax. Poor thing, she’s just a nice lady with a big heart and a very small grasp of all matters sexual. Anyway, you should know that I am not a whore and I am not looking to be attached anytime soon. I’m just working towards my dreams like everyone else. I am no different than the policeman who kills on duty or the teacher who inspires a student that later becomes an intelligent and elusive serial killer. Let’s just say, in the process of living life, there’s bound to be collateral damage. We call it nature. For every thing you gain, someone has to lose it.

My ‘former bosses’ now in high places chose me for vice president at the rotary. With me at the head, they know I will have them ‘looked after’. I have a group of young hot women like me that I have been tutoring. What’s the use of a ‘gift’ if you can’t pass it on anyway? As for you, I am happy that you’re living a normal life. I respect that. You’re one of my few true friends that I will forever be grateful to. Should you find someone you really like, just let me have a look at her just to make sure she’s not like me. Look for someone who is worth her salt and not yours.”

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Aids is real. Think first. – A Day in Dog’s Life™