‘As I read ‘Things We Never Say‘ by Ahenda and Michael, I got thinking and reflecting… You know how some chiqs try to force into a man’s heart and world even when they know it will be a futile battle. She knows he is drowning in another chiq’s love…but she won’t quit. Some are prudent and recognize it…They then concede. Thanx Mike for another opportunity..and to Ahenda, my childhood pal for helping unblock the writer’s block I was facing…’
Remember me? We met after your huge break up with your ex-girlfriend…What was her name? Ahaaa…Ahenda it is. I remember how we met: the little kahawa shop just by your office. You were starring at her picture. You looked so lost, drowning in the memory of her.
“He is so cute!” I thought to myself. That is why I sat next to you. I could see the hurt, the confusion and the sadness in how you would hold your cup of coffee; staring at it as though wishing it was beer. I knew I had a soul to rescue…a heart to save. Perhaps to save and have it for keeps. Hopefully change my ever bad luck with men.
You said hi back at me…and you did not find my obvious stares rude. I had to ask what was bugging you. And you opened up. In your voice I could feel your admiration and adoration for your lost love. A soul mate you called her. You were not certain why the two of you ended but you felt it was right. You kept trying to convince yourself that you would get over her and move on. Move on to another love with sparks as hot and cosmic as the previous.
I thought I was going to be IT-The answer to your heart ache, and the plaster to your heart break. It was an exercise in futility, but nonetheless, I had to give it a shot. You were my soldier, wounded in the cruel war…war of love. I hoped I was going to be the nurse…the nurse that puts you back together and wins you over. I wanted to be your knight and shining armour.
I wanted so bad to believe that you would like me…all the while, you were looking for the Ahenda in me. I could see it in your wishful eyes. You once asked me why I never loosened up and hang around in my undies…I was shy! I had tough shoes to fill, and I couldn’t be her. You cannot deny it Michael, you wished I were her. And now as I read your letters to her, I know I was fighting a losing battle. But I could not resist…Your charm, your smile…your finesse! I saw what Ahenda saw in you. But you could not see me for me…you were blinded. Blinded by a passion so strong and a bond so tight…sealed by destiny. Fate did not have it in store for a possible you and me…sigh!
I was surprised you had me around for so long…I knew I was fooling myself. But the desire to have you love me and want me like you constantly did her got the best of me. I was warned but I did not listen. Two years Mike!? What took you so long? What took me so long? I guess you were smutten…smitten…arrgggh! What is it about her? Now just after two months since we broke up, you are marrying her? Worst still, on the day of our ‘anniversary’? The first day I laid my eyes on you at the little kahawa shop by your office.
I should have just walked away…But then again, I concede. I raise my hat to the queen that captured your heart so…and dominated your entirety. May be I will be lucky someday to be an Ahenda to another lad…Only difference I will be an Elizabeth…Me!
My hat off to Ahenda…I concede. Love him like he loves you. Adore him like he adores you. I couldn’t steal his heart: It belonged to you in the first place! He is yours FOREVER.
I must confess I was sad when we finished the sequel for ‘Things We Never Say‘. The response from my readers was overwhelming! Almost all wanted the third issue. Well, the beautiful Liz Lenjo has saved the day. She has added an interesting angle to the whole saga. These are the things we go through in our lives. Liz Lenjo‘s words are powerful and sensual. She is a lawyer. I can’t help smiling when I try to imagine how she would present a case in court. Just don’t dare go up against her.
– Michael Ngigi
By Michael Ngigi
Nothing moves at the right pace. Your lunch is late. Your boyfriend, too early. Just when you needed a few more minutes with the girls. The baby wakes you up in the middle of the night just when you have the interview of your life early in the morning. The urge to run to the toilet always tortures you at the wrong time. And your stomach feels like a storm; just when you’re in that crucial meeting.
Now you feel like passing air. Too bad you’re in the elevator.
“Go on do it!” the small pop-up devil at the side of your head urges. For a moment you feel like you’d take the advice and run with it.
Did you just send her roses early in the morning today with a birthday note? You just made a stupid mistake! Read her text again. It read she was having a ‘bad day’ not BIRTHDAY you idiot! Furthermore her birthday was last month dummy! You forgot didn’t you? What the hell is wrong with TIME?!
Do you know why Kate is smoking weed at the back of the house during her birthday party? She is worried about the question of time and pace. She feels like everything is moving too fast. She can’t seem to catch up. Peete is entertaining her friends inside the house. At least that’s where she left him. She looks at the bracelet Peete just gave her for a birthday gift. Her stomach feels unsettled. She can’t help noticing the ‘Happy 25. I love you – Peete’ stamped clearly on it. She takes a long drag. As her head goes lighter, her heart grows heavier. Something doesn’t feel right.
Kate and Peete met two months ago at a friend’s party. Kate had just broken up with her boyfriend and so Peete came at the right time, of course as a shoulder to lean on. There after they met for coffee and a few hangouts later, Peete suggested they take their friendship to another level. In the heat of the moment, Kate agreed. At first it was bliss for these lovebirds and Peete would often outdo himself. He hopelessly loved Kate. She loved him too but could not shake of that feeling of falling helplessly into an abyss of unknown nature. She hated that she wasn’t in control. Everything was moving too fast. For her it didn’t feel like she’d had enjoyed enough time as a single woman. It felt more like this ‘new love’ was too rushed. She realized she didn’t know him well enough.
Then there was this other guy called Theo that she’d met the week before at the gym. They spoke for a few minutes and exchanged numbers. He seem interesting and had this magnetic mystery around him. He promised to call her before the week was over. She felt excited at the thought of seeing him again. He is two days late but she still has a strong feeling that he’ll call her. With this in mind, she knows Peete wants her to devote to the relationship. She is in trouble. She is has been possessed by the Delayed Devotion Demon. Don’t get her wrong, she thinks Peete is a very good guy. Caring and loving. It’s just that she needs more time.
The party is getting louder and everyone is excited except Peete. He pretends to be enjoying but his mind is overloaded. He is thinking about how Kate reacted when he gave her the bracelet. He knows that look. He’s seen it before. A few months before,his then girlfriend had broken up with him citing that she needed time off. She had that same look. He knows he can’t handle another breakup. Not now. His head feels dizzy.
As a friend, there are things I’d rather Peete knew that would save him a heart ache. You see, Kate is like an empire that you’ve set out to conquer with limited resources. You have to do it bit by bit. You should know that before you came along, she was doing pretty well by herself and that she didn’t need saving. kate has many friends, both female and male. She likes partying and having fun and goes out almost two times in a week. She loves the attention she gets whenever she goes out. She is beautiful so why not? She likes the freedom and the spontaneity.
When you met her, she liked you because you seemed like an interesting guy. You also looked a bit distant. She is used to men kissing the ground she walks on but you did the opposite. You sat in the party by yourself and seemed to enjoy your own company. Women love that. She felt like a queen when you made your move on her. Now two months later, you have changed. You are hopelessly ‘in love’. You’ve become a wuss, something very different from the macho image you had projected. At first you used to wait a day before you could reply her texts, now you call every minute of the day. Too much love and attention can be choking.It is making her uneasy.
Understand that her feelings for you have to be allowed to develop over time. The men who were in her life didn’t just fall off when she became your girlfriend. They fade out slowly. You have to conquer her bit by bit. It takes time. You want her to love you? Let her go. Give her space. She knows you are a good guy so don’t fret. Act like the cool guy you are. Don’t be afraid to lose. After all, what use is it for you to be with a girl who doesn’t feel for you as feel for her? When was the last time you had a drink with your boys? Pick up the phone. Call them. Let her breathe.
Don’t smother her with the kind of affection that screams you want to marry her, have ten kids and move upcountry to a farm house. It scares women away. Take time to learn from her. How to treat her. How to love her. Only in this way, can you be successfully cast out the Delayed Devotion Demon.
Too bad, we can’t talk such things man to man. So go ahead and mess up Peete. A man learns from trial and error.
Thank you Catherine for giving me the idea for today’s article. You gave me a note telling me to talk about the Delayed Devotion Demon. Well, here you are. I have to hand it to you though, your handwriting is awful 🙂